Sunday, 4 October 2009

Inglourious Basterds- The Review


Only Tarantino can pull of a movie like Inglourious Basterds, and does he do it with some panache or what. Inglourious Basterds is a movie high on steroids with a jolts of white lightning profusely mixed into it. Tarantino has the magical ability of creating an utlra tense situation and adding a dash of subtle humour, which by no means reduces the tension per se, but keeps you rivetted all the more. You can actually laugh at the sheer grim and horrific situations that the characters find themselves in.

Take for example the opening sequence which introduces us to the cunning, conniving, scheming, adjectives are less to describe the sinister nature of Hans Landa, who slowly but surely gets all the information from the poor french farmer LaPadite, while cooly sipping away at milk. Christoph Waltz has given a performance of a lifetime and would definitely deserve a shot at the Oscars for this. You would definitely need a subbed version of the DVD to enjoy the conversations better. You can watch him get evil by the minute, as he starts comparing the Jews to rats, and that they are the cause for the bubonic plague. Just as you think that their conversation has become less tense where Landa starts comparing squirrels to rats, saying that both are rodents the scene takes an amazing reversal and Landa's men discover the Jews hiding in the basement a-la rats.

Tarantino breathes life into some amazing characters like Hugo Stiglitz- the gestapo killer, the baseball wielding Bear Jew, little man-Smithson, and the heavily accented Aldo Raine played by Bradd Pitt. As, in the case of some of his earlier movies Tarantino has arranged the movie by chapters and some of these amazing characters come to life in the second chapter titled Inglourios Basterds. The Basterds led by Lt. Aldo raine are a bunch of Nazi german killers put together to instill fear across the third reich. One of the scenes that will remain etched in the viewers memory is that of the Bear Jew mercilessly beating a gestapo with a baseball bat when he does not divulge the german hideouts.Tarantino has the notoriety to use extreme violence and gore, and this movie is no different, with the uncut version having multiple head scalping and extreme bloody scenes. Aldo also has his own unique way of marking the German officers who can be identified later as Nazi jew hunters.

The movie unfolds further in the third and forth chapters where we are introduced to the beautiful Emmanuelle who owns a theatre in Paris, and a completely smitten war hero Fredric Zoller. So smitten is zoller by the beautiful Emmanuelle that he changes the venue of a war movie 'Nations Pride' starring himself for which the the Fuhrer Hitler himself is going to be present. Enter the beautiful Diane Kruger as Bridget Von Hammersmark who is a German actress but actually helping out the Basterds in their plans. One of the scenes in a bar is utterly hilarious but which ends up in a messy gun fight, since Hicox -An english officer is not able to maintain his german accent.On being found out Hicox has this to say "Now, about this pickle we find ourselves in..." and then ensues a Bar brawl like no other. Soon we find out that Emmanuelle is no bimbo and she has some plans of her own, as she is the lone survivor of the assualt that Landa had carried out earlier. Watch out for the scene where she does a Rambo, getting ready for the D-day of Operation Kino, complete with lipstick doubling up as Facepaint and all. In between all this commotion Bridget tries to slip Aldo and his team as Italians inside the theatre. One of my most favorite scenes from the movies is that of Landa asking Aldo and his henchmen to repeat their names again and again- Gorlomi, Margherita and Deccocco. Little does Bridget know that Landa knows everything about her and is quite fluent in Italian as well.

You do feel sorry for Emmanuelle/Shosanna since both her and zoller die in the shootout in the projector room but her friend Marcel keeps his promise and the theatre turns into a fireball. And just as you think that Landa has managed to strike a deal with the Basterds and would go scott free, there is another twist in the tale. You kind of feel the pleasure when Aldo creates his masterpiece marking Landa on the forehead.

Inglourious Basterds is Tarantino at his best, pure and pristine film making with a complete assault to your senses. Go get attacked and feel the pleasure in the pain.

Wednesday, 23 September 2009

Calling XL'ers: Laughter Guaranteed


Disclaimer: This is not a work of fiction. All characters are real and can be found somewhere or the other if you try really hard to find them. All the incidents below have actually happened.

Scene1: After a gruelling mock interview session where students had donned the role of BCG executives and wannabe Consultants.
FJSJ: "Son, What is that?" (Pointing to an old Dennis the Menace wall clock)
Poor Wannabe PW: "I'm sorry that we extended our alloted time".. umm aahh blah blah
FJSJ: "Son I asked you a simple question, What is that?"
PW:"We are sorry, but we couldn't finish it in time"... blah blah blah
FJSJ: "Is it so difficult for you to answer such a simple question, What is that"(in unmeasurable Decibels)....
PW: Nearly in tears"Thats a wall clock"

FJSJ: Not done yet "And what does it show" ..... :D
PW: "The time".....
All others rolling in the aisles

Scene2: After another such Mock interview session to a wannabe:
FJSJ: "Son, if the amount of information that you know about the company be written on the back of a postage stamp, there would still be enough space to write your resume over there."
All roar again.... :D

Scene3: On a VIP's visit to campus:
FJSJ: "You think with a speech like that you will be allowed to introduce him to others, you should be glad if they allow you to even polish his shoes..."

Scene4: On a hyper active mock interview by a wannabe:
FJSJ: "Son, the performance that you put up, even a 39th grade tamil comedian of C grade movies would be impressed by you."

Scene5: On a speech about independence by a wannabe:
FJSJ: "And, Son you said 'Passionate Forefathers'. Do you understand the meaning of passion, and that it is used in a sexual way."

Scene6: A Cell phone rings in the class by mistake:
FJSJ: "If I hear another phone ring, I will personally go and plant all your mobiles in the garden outside. Who is going to call you incompetent idiots anyway."

Scene7: On a question by a wannabe about apostrophes and colons:
FJSJ: "Why does everyone feel like i'm responsible for all the idiots in this world."

Scene8: On repeating the question by another wannabe:
FJSJ: "Do I hear a echo in the classroom"

Some gems from B:

Scene9: After another of those Mock Interviews:
FJSJ: "You think you did a good job, I hate to tell you but the whole interview panel was a bunch of dumb idiots who dont have an iota of information about your company, but I'm glad you selected him, not because he knows anything but because he is also a complete idiot like you guys."
Rolling in the aisles again with laughter...

Scene10: About etiquettes of starting conversations:
FJSJ: "You cannot just walk upto someone and ask them stupid questions like "Why have you bought this?" or "Why do you talk like that?"
Poor wannabe: Looks on in amazement...
FJSJ: "See for example I cannot ask him (pointing to poor wannabe) Why he looks so stupid?"

And thats not all, I know there are more. I would kindly request you all to add whatever anecdotes, remarks, statements you remember and post them as comments on this post for all others to enjoy...Cheers

Tuesday, 22 September 2009

You absolutely rock!!!


My previous post got me many phone calls, emails, comments, bouquets and brick bats. Many of them agreed to their psychological profile, and a few complained about some aspects and a few completely went overboard and said that I was a freak, which I would vehemently oppose but in a later post, maybe. First and foremost, Sorry Scott for shamelessly recreating your scenario but just couldn't resist the temptation. Okay so coming back to the profile thing, what I exactly did was a "Cold Read".

One fascinating aspect of the cold read, as it applies to horoscopes for example, is that they are more entertaining than you think they ought to be. I don't believe in astrology, but if you put a horoscope in front of me I will immediately look for Libra and read it. Likewise, I always take the time to open fortune cookies. What's up with that?
Answer: The most fascinating topic in the world, at least to you, is you.

Apparently, one of the big secrets of writing is that readers care about themselves more than they care about just about anything else. A writer can easily keep you interested if he writes someting personal about you, about your likes (and dislikes).

The cold read concept also overlaps with hypnosis and other forms of influence, such as advertising, sales, and seduction. When people believe, you understand them at a level they have not yet chosen to reveal, you get into their heads quickly, and that gives you influence. For example, you might say to a customer that you met only minutes ago, "I can tell you're a man who likes to get all the information before making a decision." It's a general statement that applies to most people, but it will feel to the customer as if you understand him, and his guard will come down a little, even if he knows exactly what you're up to. And he will like you better for turning the topic to him.There are many methodologies that are used, such as Barnum statements, Shot gun approach,Rainbow ruse etc, If you want to learn more about "Cold read" : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cold_reading

Right now you're wondering if something so simple would really work. You're a bit skeptical because things that sound that simple usually don't work. And if it were really that easy, wouldn't you already know about it? After all, you're extremely well read. In any gathering, you're the one who seems to know the most about lots of different topics. How can you test the cold read concept for influencing someone to see if it's legit? How would you Google it?

And, I definitely do not believe in astrology. That's because we Librans are always caught in two minds.... :D